Tag Archives: thom derby
Mayor Larry's Office: 425 East State Street, Rockford, IL

Letter From Our Lord and CEO of All to Larry

January 12th, 2013 Dear Lawerence; or shall I address you here within as Larry? I have just read yours of the 29th. electronically addressed to myself through the world wide web of information. If there be in it any statements, or assumptions of fact, which I may know to be erroneous, I do not, now […]

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Metal-Panties-101

METAL PANTIES 101: Lord Thom Derby Introduces Metal Panties Rules

Today’s 4th annual third Quarterly meeting had every single Derby | Reynolds employee hi-fiving, hugging and making out with each other after Lord Derby’s speech.  The CEO AND LORD OF ALL HERE AT THE WAL-MART OF ADVERTISING™ was in high form, smiling and yelling.  BElow is a transcription of his speech to us: “That’s right. […]

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Thom Derby, caught driving in Milwaukee, WI, in his younger days before his first million. Photograph submission by Justin P.

Lord Thomas Derby’s Cars, Photographed by Fans of The United States of Derby | Reynolds™

Fans of the United States of Derby | Reynolds™ have caught our CEO and LORD of all, Thom Derby, driving many vintage and collectible cars over the years.  Below are a few photos of Thom’s cars that our soldiers have sent us.  If you see Thom or one of our sales raid members driving through […]

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Thom Derby, CEO & LORD of all, Sponsors & Stars on Radio Show

Mr. Thomas Derby started off 2012 by sponsoring poor artists in poor regions of America.  One of those sponsorships turned into a part-time starring role for Thom.  Our CEO and LORD of all has joined the incredible radio show, Andy & Reggie’s Songs About Stuff & Things Radio Hour. 12 episodes total season 1, the […]

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Mr. Gordin thought Sean Lippy was gay. Mr. Gordin loves Motley Crüe.

Lippy’s Lessons | 17: Mr. Gordin is the Son of the Father

… and the Fathers of the Sons destroyed it all for their Sons to Fix but they can’t and they don’t and it won’t stop cause this is America and pastyassed sons of good ol’ boys be runnin Taco Johns and loving on Motley Crüe. Yo yo yo smothér sü©kers, this here Lippy Lesson goes […]

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Derby-Reynolds_Lambo

NEW COMPANY CAR! Introducing the 2012 Derby Lamboguinea™

Thomas Derby, CEO AND LORD OF ALL IN THE YOU$A™, Buys Custom Orange Lamborghini To Replace Custom Orange H2 Hummers! Thomas Derby, the CEO & LORD of all here at DerbyReynolds.com, has decided to raid poor villages in America with his new custom orange Lamborghini.  During today’s 3.875 hour creative production meeting, Thom announced: “I […]

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Derby Birdie™:  Sent to save Sean Lippy's Sex Life

Lippy’s Lessons | 16: Springtime is here, and Lippy gonna git sum!

  Yawl feel me? That’s right. Winter is mother fucking over.  It feels like yesterday that me and T-Derbs were hunting for monster bucks and saw that orange-furred monster doe with the white dot on it.  Was it all a dream? Hail fucking no. What you think? Lippy don’t dream, he scheme, that’s right- I […]

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Potaytoe

Lippy’s Lessons | 15: My successful 34 year old body and how I looks so good!

  Today the Rockford Register Star, a little town newsletter in the peasant region of Illinois bout fitty miles from Derby | Reynolds, axed me on the facebook dot commie, “Share your successes and struggles with weight loss here. Way to go, Angela!”  Now, I don’t knows who this Angela is because  wes have many […]

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Thom Derby and Bill Reynolds, like trees in the prime of their careers, split the company into 2 Divisions

A Letter from Thomas Derby regarding the split of Derby | Reynolds into 2 Divisions

Mr. Thom Derby happily announces the new division, “Derby | Reynolds – Marketing Solutions, A Division of DERBY | REYNOLDS”! As of October 1st, 2011, we here at Derby | Reynolds – Marketing Solutions, a Division of DERBY | REYNOLDS, will specialize in providing the global marketplace a place to rest your weary head, a […]

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