PRESS RELEASE: FEBRUARY 20, 2020 Lord Thomas Derby, esteemed CEO of DERBY |...
Recent News From D. | R. - H.Q.
Lippy’s Lessons | 15: My successful 34 year old body and how I looks so good!
Today the Rockford Register Star, a little town newsletter in the peasant region of Illinois bout fitty miles from Derby | Reynolds, axed me on the facebook dot commie, “Share your successes and struggles with weight loss here. Way to go, Angela!” Now, I don’t knows who this Angela is because wes have many […]
Lippy’s Lessons | 14: Look at that monster buck o’er there, she sho do look like she tastes good!
Well hello! It has been a long time for me, Sean Lippy, to talk to yous. I have been bizzy helping Mr. Thom Derby hunt for deer this fall. We sat up all night watching the monster buck series on the DVD back in September and he saids to me, “Seanny, you stick with me […]
Lippy’s Lessons | 13: I gots drunk with my boy Barry and wrote a poem for Mr. Gordin last night
Ok yawl so I was gettin my drink on at Old Chicago last night with Barry. That boy can drink. We be hitting all the bars since the leaves started goin Derby orange on our ass. We love Chile’s on Friday, Applebees on Tuesdays, Buffalo Wild Wings on Mondays and late tonight we fenda hit […]
Lippy’s Lessons | 12: Mr. Stevie Jobs, I will mos def stay hungry & foolish at Derby Reynolds cuz peasant life aint for me!
“I be watching you on the internets of late after Stevie died and yawl gotta lotta nerve to quote the one man who broke all the rules while you sit back on your peasant lives being the same as everyone else. Have you thought differently today? No. Did you pass up your 3 egg and […]
A Letter from Thomas Derby regarding the split of Derby | Reynolds into 2 Divisions
Mr. Thom Derby happily announces the new division, “Derby | Reynolds – Marketing Solutions, A Division of DERBY | REYNOLDS”! As of October 1st, 2011, we here at Derby | Reynolds – Marketing Solutions, a Division of DERBY | REYNOLDS, will specialize in providing the global marketplace a place to rest your weary head, a […]
Lippy’s Lessons | 11: Who are yous? I tell yous!
YAWL KNOW WASSUP?! Well, it’s Friday for one; secondly, there’s been some crazy bowl sheet going down at THE WAL-MART OF ADVERTISING.™ I’m not allowed to talk about it yet but when I dos, yawls will knows. We gonna be bigger than ever is all my ass fenda share with yous about Mr Thom and […]
Lippy’s Lessons | 10: Bill Hicks already said it for me, “Scumbags.”
There’s some bowl sheet going down at DERBY | REYNOLDS. 1. LaVonne, she a rat! That old ho be ratting on me. 2. Big Bill Reynolds wants me out, but my boy T-Derby be standing up for me! Well I aints got nothin new to say to yawl bout all this shit that my main man […]
Jeff Tethernick Swoons Embry-Riddle in Houston, Texas
The Color Orange (aka, DERBY | REYNOLDS) made a huge impression Friday night, Aug. 5th, in Houston, Texas. Jeff Tethernick, head of our Accounting Department, had been vacating with his family when a chance encounter with a foul ball at a Houston Astros game led his son, Vince, into the arms of one of the […]
Lippy’s Lessons | 9: My boy, T-Derbs, & I fenda christian choke hold all yawl fake churches runnin’ around as ad firms.
Yawl miss me? Well. Lemme tell yawl what’s been up really quickly without swearing. Ok sos, LaVonne Hayes (rat) is a tattle teller. She be telling Mr. Reynolds I swears too much on the internets. Last week, Mr. Reynolds went to my boy, T-Derbs, his company partner, and says, “We have to fire Sean. He’s […]
Lippy’s Lessons | 8: Chinga Tu Madre, Lavonne! Chinga Tu Madre, You Rat Ho!
Yawl prolly know wassup today. LaVonne be rattin on me and sh!t. Old Ho told Big Bill Reynolds, one of our company’s founding fathers, that I be swearing up a storm in this house. Yawl know what? I am. LaVonne has had it out for me since day 1. I even wrote about it last […]
